Hurry Up and Wait

With the soothing background symphony of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Muppet Babies, and Daniel the Tiger, I sat trying to get the last of my work done.  It had been a long week swimming through projects, emails, and technology I struggled to adapt to all while working under the tyranny of a three year-old who daily attempts to declare himself boss.

My brain was weary, but I pushed ahead.  Because my work is a peculiar kind, I fumbled through Instagram to complete the last of my tasks.  And that’s when I saw it.

It was as if the heavens opened, and the angels sang of its glory.  It was a conference being held in Southern California, led by one of the greats.  A woman I hold in high regard who epitomizes all that I hope to one day be.  It would be the experience of a lifetime gaining valuable knowledge and wisdom from someone nearly twenty years my senior who has traveled down many paths on which I can only hope to one day embark.

I read through the information.

I studied over the application.

I pondered my potential answers to the questions.

I dreamed of what it would be like soaking in every word and feverishly taking notes.

And then, with a sinking feeling, I closed the tab.  The timing just isn’t right, I thought.

I looked out the window distracted for a moment with many thoughts of who I am, who I’ve been, who I hope to one day become.  I considered all the hopes and dreams that remain undone.  Plans I spent hours curating as a wide-eyed teenager that have been carefully filed away.  A calling that still echoes loudly deep down in my heart and soul.  But again, the timing just isn’t right. 

 I opened my phone again to continue my work, and a new image refreshed on the screen.  A random quote had appeared at the top of my feed, “When the time is right, I, The Lord, will make it happen.”

I sat there for a moment letting my eyes steadily focus over the words as they settled deep into my soul.  When the time is right.  And for now, it’s not right.

This idea is a very counter-cultural one.  Society is not a friend to waiting.  You want something?  Get out there.  Make it happen.  Take life by the horns and push until you get what is yours.

We live in a world where if you aren’t hustling every minute to make your dreams a reality, while enviously watching everyone’s highlight reel on social media for added motivation, then what are you even doing with your life?

To be sure, I have been guilty of this idea myself.  I have perpetuated this theology.  And yet sometimes, God simply says… WAIT.

Can I speak a little freedom into your heart right now?  You don’t have to feel like a failure if your current position doesn’t look like that chic you’re watching on the internet.  Who you are today only needs to be who God has called you to be today.

Does that mean I can’t sharpen my skills?  Do I let my dreams begin to fade?  Should I do nothing to cultivate my craft?  Of course not.  But when it comes to pushing and prying and panicking at the door until I force it open, sometimes it’s best to wait.

Do your part.  But allow God to provide the opportunity for His will come to pass in His good time.

For now, it is okay to wait.  Maybe, just maybe, the life that God is calling you to is so big and so grand that you need time to build a foundation strong enough to hold the blessings that are coming.  Maybe, just maybe, you’re in a season of building.

You’ve been working so hard to get to the finish line.  Rest easy knowing that there is more to life than just the end.  God is calling you to goodness all through the journey, not just at the destination.  Today, you are enough.  Rest your hand in His, and simply wait…