In the Center of Circumstance

“Mmm. Love that.” These were my mom’s words referring to my sweet baby boy. “I just love when you pick a baby up, and they stop crying.” It was a thought that had not escaped my own mind just a few weeks before.

The third baby.

Here is the general cycle I seemed to have noticed. For the first, I felt strangely at a loss, yet confident that I had this mother thing all figured out—it was what I was born to do. For the second, I thought I had it figured out, yet spent every day wondering if I would survive and considering the idea of a permanent vacation. (Note: We survived, and I never ran away.) For the third, everything seems new again. Even still, there is an easiness that comes with parenting. A sense of knowing exactly what I should be doing– you know, along with a madness that comes with balancing the needs of three.

This has been one of the most trying times of my life for so many reasons, but in all of His mercy, God blessed me with just an angel of a baby. My sweet Roman smiles in his sleep, smiles at strangers, smiles when you walk into the room– just an incredibly happy little man. But he likes to eat. So one of the few times you will hear him cry is when he is ready to eat. It was in the middle of the night a few weeks back that he began to cry. I knew he was hungry, but didn’t have his bottle quite ready. As I picked him up, he instantly settled. He immediately quit crying. He was still hungry, I hadn’t begun to feed him yet, but he knew it was coming.

In that moment, Roman’s circumstances had not changed. He was still hungry. But he knew his momma, who loves him so, had a solution on the way. And so he could rest in my arms, knowing all that he needed would be provided.

It was in that moment of middle of the night weariness that God gave me an incredible picture of what it is like to rest in Him. Your circumstances may not change immediately, but you can rest knowing that there is a Father who cares for you so much. He longs to provide all that you need. When your consistent feelings about your current circumstances are changed because of your confidence in your Creator and Comforter, then you know you are walking in faith that will see the goodness of the Lord in His perfect timing…

“If you then being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children,

how much MORE will the Father who is heaven give good things to those who ask Him!”

Matthew 7:11